Thursday, February 25, 2010
Now for an article that is almost as vapid and offensive as the graphic above. The Washington Post has done some serious investigative journalism and discovered that some black women date some white men. This is a serious matter worthy of deep discussion, cuz race and gender and slavery and such. Thank goodness a real black woman Karyn Folan (who is in an actual, real life interracial marriage herself) wrote a book all about it.
The provocatively titled Don't Bring Home a White Boy: And Other Notions That Keep Black Women From Dating Out takes the bold position that, contrary to popular opinion, black women and white men are capable of that love thing. Together. This is good for black woman, because according to her most black men spend too much time smoking crack in jail with white women to bother with marriage. So she has some sage advice for women who want to date black men exclusively: don't. But there are consequences to such controversial behavior, as evidenced by the testimonial below:
Lorraine Spencer, 44, calls herself pro-black (?). She has traced her ancestry and is proud of her heritage, she says. And yet, "from my own personal experience, people tend to treat you as though you have lost your right to speak on black issues or you are not taken as seriously because somehow you don't have the same experience if you have decided to marry transracially," she says. "I've been called a sellout or white-acting, so to speak, or a person who hates black people by co-workers and family."
Oh, really, by whom? Who the heck are you hanging out with? How does that come up in conversation?
Lorraine: "Wow, I sure don't like that new Tyler Perry movie."
Black coworker/family member; "Shut up Lorraine, you sellout! You lost your chance to talk about black things when you married that white guy. All this "pro-black" identification is just a front. You hate black people and act white."
Who says this to a 44 year old woman? Come on!
But unfortunately this is only one of Folan's nine patented "notions" that are keeping black women from non-negro dating.
Those notions also include:
(1) "After slavery, I would never, ever date a white man" This is interesting, slavery is the #1 "notion." By that logic black women should be refusing to work for white bosses as well.
(4) "I don't find white men attractive"; Not sure how Folan rebutts that, but I'm sure it's really half-assed. Are you seriously going to let a book convince you that you're attracted to someone you're not attracted to?
(5) "White men don't find black women attractive unless they look like Beyoncé"; Which is evidenced Beyonce's white husband, Jay-Z.
Here's my advice: if you're not comfortable dating someone for any reason, don't. And don't listen to some book telling you otherwise. The only person that should be convincing you to date outside of your race is the white dude who's hitting on you.